Sometimes for me the sexiest sex has no sex! HA! Aidee, spot on for me: I think good erotic romance can have BDSM but not all BDSM books are erotic. Likewise, I think erotic romance can have "vanilla" sex and be full of eroticism. I don't (generally) like to traditional / modern (popular) BDSM*, it doesn't move me and that's not the definition of "erotic" for me! * I say this loosely. It depends on the BDSM toys used, the setting, the characters ... many many things that determine eroticism, and have nothing to do with the BDSM lifestyle per se. It's like, if two likeable hot characters i